The Beauty of the Unknown

I read a quote once that said, "traveling is about the beautiful feeling of teetering in the unknown." As I sit in a bus headed towards San Francisco International Airport, I realize how true that statement is. This is the first moment in weeks that I feel at complete peace with what is happening and where I am going.

Perhaps it's the fact that what's done is done, and what's packed is packed. I can't turn this bus around and anything forgotten can be purchased. But the beautiful feeling of the unknown is almost sedative. It compels one to trust, knowing that everything will work out in the end, and that challenges will be faced and conquered.

It is inevitable that I will face challenges along my journey. I pray it is nothing as big as a lost bag or a stolen credit card, but even if that were to happen, I would not be the first tourist to endure that. That's why you do your best to be safe, keep back up numbers and purchase travel insurance. Sometimes being too cautions makes you even more vulnerable to the very thing you are trying to prevent.

This trip is full of a lot of firsts: traveling alone, new countries, backpacking, no hotel reservations, and no computer. In my studies I have learned that "detachment" is just right ordered attachment, and that's what this trip is all about. Detachment from all the unnecessary distractions in life, and right ordered attachment to what is necessary and important: God, family, friends, human connection, and service.

I thank you all for following me along this journey of growth and self discovery. I encourage you to take a moment each day to observe and recollect. As my friend Dr. Jen pointed out, those are the moments that you carry with you forever. Never miss an opportunity to conquer and discover one of the most beautiful countries in the world, yourself.

I ask for your patience as I blog from my phone. All of you readers who have iPhone's or other smart phones know the joys of "autocorrect." Also, please keep me in your prayers and know that you'll be in mine.

I now walk into the wild.

- Jordan

What do you need? Really?

The past few weeks have been very trying and tiresome. I have realized that I did not plan as much as I should have for this trip. I have found out that waiting till last minute is not much fun. I have discovered that I don't really like planning, and that is why I put things off. Most important of all, I have noticed that life keeps on moving, even when you don't.  Seconds pass by, minutes fade away, and before you know it you fly to China in three days and have not even started packing.

Not only does life continue to move, but it has the tendency to throw you curve balls as well. In the middle of all my planning my hard drive decided to crash. I lost everything. EVERYTHING. No more music, no more pictures, no more trip planning materials. Resume that I spent hours creating? Poof. Candid shots of my semester abroad? Nada. Sure, I have a fair amount of photos on Facebook and I would also venture to guess that my resume may be found in the sent folder of my Gmail account. But in the moment, it felt as though my entire world had just fallen out from under me. Right when I was getting ready to put my world on hold to discover a new one on the other side of the globe, my comforts and familiarities at home were suddenly gone.

While I don't necessarily believe that God is sitting upstairs with puppet strings controlling when my hard drive is going to fail, showering me with anxieties like rain from a Seattle sky, I do believe he can teach me a lot through it. First, the importance of backing up and preparing for the unknown, because you don't know what you've got until it's gone! I'm not just talking about things digitally either. Tell people you love them, in the moment, when you can. Take the time you have to grow while you're young so you don't look back when you're old. Choose to focus on the positives, because if you really spend the time doing so you will discover that they always outweigh the negatives. Continue to press on in the face hardships and setbacks. Be a person of commitment, doing what you say when you say you're going to do it. We have three main choices: give up, give in, or give it all you've got.  I choose the later.

Second, I have begun learning what you really need in life, and it isn't much. I don't need an iPhone, or a MacBook, or a fancy car, or the best clothes. Are they alluring? Yes. Do I like my iPhone? You bet! But do I NEEEEED it? No. Looking back it is funny to think about riding around with my mom in our old white Mazda van, going about our daily duties before cell phones were even popular. We survived, and I imagine that in a lot of ways we survived much better. Now we live in an age where we have to know the answer to the problem or question in the exact moment. But as I have slowly been discovering, "life is not a problem to be solved, but a mystery to be lived."

So, am I going on my trip? Yes. Do I have everything figured out and planned? No. Will everything work out alright? Most definitely. In fact, this is probably how it was meant to be all along. God uses the most difficult of situations to point you back to him, causing you to realize it's him first, everything else second. I am excited to see the world and all that He has in store for me along the way, because I know the learning has only just begun. My friend Joanie sent me an amazing quote to that I intend to remind myself of each step of the way: "Live in the present. Launch yourself on every wave. Find eternity in each moment." With that in mind I gear up to answer the call of the wild.

Romans 8:28 "We know that all things work for good for those who love God."